The Eye of the Tiger

Lately, I've feel like giving up! Enough with all the hopes and dreams. I've feel as if I don't have one single ounce of "fight" left in my bones.

Now don't get me wrong I know this blog is meant to encourage and not discourage but I have to be honest. I feel like throwing in the towel.

Normally, I'd keep thoughts like these to myself but I feel like it's okay to share.

So, for starters I spoke with a friend today and she said the meanest things she's ever said to me today. REALLY, it was the MEANEST things she's ever said. I was talking to her about my plans for the future and she literally cut me off telling me she wasn't interested in anything I was talking about. In short, she sensed I was giving up. She actually had the NERVE to tell to keep fighting! Hmph! LOL (No harm intended she's here to help)

But my question is,what if I'm tired of fighting? What if I want to give in? Do I have the right to?

Usually, this is the last thing I would do but to tell the truth after years of fighting for something it's easy to lose sight of what I'm even fighting for.

Lucky for me I have friends and family that are here to remind me. But the thing is I'M the one that's got to keep going. I'M the one that has to continue to fight. Every blow, punch, kick or shove is all aimed at me. And I'm supposed to stay in the ring? Wtheck?

Now, please take this with a grain of salt because no matter where I go or what I decide to do, I probably will somehow find a way to encourage myself to keep going. Whether it's finding that old S I used to where on my chest back when I believed I could take on the world. Back when I was SUPERWOMAN. Or perhaps,  I will find solace in the promises of God and reflect on all that he's brought me through. Lord knows I've got a whole treasure chest of instances where he's brought me through tougher times than this.

Heck, who knows, I could just continue to be stubborn and refuse to lose just to prove someone wrong. Just to prove it to myself and others who may doubt me. To prove to my supporters that they were right along, I AM a fighter.

But right now, it's hard to tell. Not only is it hard to tell what I'll wind up doing but it's hard to tell if I will do anything at all.

It seems like everywhere I turn there's some giant that needs slaying. Some mountain to climb. Some valley to cross. Can a girl get a break?! Some help of some sort? I mean my goodness, even Moses had a rod to help cross the Red Sea.

Sometimes, the load seems so much to bare. Somehow I've got to re-up my strength. Pull from my reserves.  I guess it's true what they say "Only the strong survive".

And if I'm nothing else, I know for a fact I'm strong!

So, for today I'm thankful for those that love me enough to pick me up when I'm down. Refuse to accept defeat. Won't accept less than the best from me. Those who pray for me and with me with I'm at a loss for words. And for those that believe in me even when I don't believe in myself. Thank you for seeing GREATNESS in me! Thank you for never letting me fall. Thanks for cheering me on when it seems as though I'll never win.

So I guess the verdicts in...looks like I have no choice but to keep fighting! With friends like mine, QUITTING ISN'T AN OPTION! (Thanks Sammie! For hurting my feelings enough to kick me back in gear)

Ring the bells "Ding, ding, ding!" Time for the next round!

 (Playing song "The Eye of the Tiger)....

 Sincerely,

Me